A lady should never diminish her confidence and sparkle for a man, nor for any other reason. For some, this principle need not be stated. Many women, however, find it a struggle to maintain their confidence amid difficult situations and emotional pulls. Confidence indeed is an elusive quality. You cannot gain it by trickery or by a handy mnemonic device (believe me, I've tried!). Nevertheless, confidence is a quality most central to our feminine vocation.
We can never stand still--we either progress in our lives or regress. For that reason, ladies must pay special attention to their own dignity and important role. A friend of mine remarked, "I'm so sick of all those femininity talks; all they do is say, 'You're a woman, yay!'" While it is true that we have to be careful to keep our reflections on femininity taut and to-the-point, at the same time there's a real sense in which repeated affirmation does help us. We need to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, how lovely and wonderful we really are. Of course, this means seeing ourselves from God's perspective, a difficult task.
Once we have that vision, however, confidence follows. Confidence follows from prayer. Even if we could have confidence without God, it would be vain. We would rush to build and to preserve vain things. We would easily be trapped in pride of material possessions and physical beauty. This is not true confidence. Confidence means to confide, to confide in God. From Psalm 83 we read, Beatus homo, qui sperat in te--blessed is the man that trusteth in Thee.
Coming back to how we live out confidence, we can remember that we are not frustrated. At some point, everyone feels a bit frustrated. When this happens, we see that some people are ready to play to our weaknesses. We must resist these people--true friends play to our strengths--and pray for them as well as for ourselves. Confidence is all about retaining control: not control of a situation, for that is almost always impossible, but self-control. To stay confident, simply keep in mind these words of Eleanor Roosevelt: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." You have been given the abilities to enact beauty, to bring peace, to shower love; these tools are at your disposal at every moment, like arrows in the archer's quiver. Once you realize your gifted power, and live and breathe as God's precious one, you can exude the confidence that will make God and man alike smile for joy.