Monday, February 2, 2009

The Perfect Wedding


As the special day approaches on which a woman will marry the man she loves, her heart starts to fill to bursting--with a multitude of concerns about her dress, the bridesmaid dresses, the church, the reception hall, the food, the flowers, the invitations, the relatives, the baby's breath, the utensils, the amount of alcohol, the honeymoon, the money to be spent, etc. Her feminine mind, though used to multi-tasking, may quickly be overwhelmed with stress!

It may truthfully be said that an engagement ring is a good test of a man. He must sacrifice a substantial portion of his income for what may seem to him a small and insignificant thing, a little ring; yet he puts the care and thought into it that he must put into the daily sacrifices he will do for the bride he has won. The wedding, on the other hand, tests the woman. She must somehow manage this grand event, with people everywhere--hordes of people!--unsavory relatives, anxious parents, restive bridesmaids, unknown future relatives. She has to coordinate all the little touches that will serve her guests. As she will be to her new family, she is now, the servant of all. Nevertheless, in the midst of much serving, she can never lose sight that everything has come about because of love.

Without love, there would be no marriage, no engagement, no courtship, and indeed no beginning to one's life at all. Can anyone ever say she made love happen? Love comes from above, given freely, never orchestrated or concocted. The demands of love are simple: love always, in every single moment. Thus, amid the multiplicity of cares and tasks a lady must tackle in preparing the solemnity of her wedding, she looks to distill them into one simple act. She will love. She will love God, love her husband, love her family, and love all her wedding guests. In this love, no matter the details of the ceremony or the reception, the most beautiful wedding possible will emerge.

7 comments:

dark but fair said...

Lovely post, and true indeed, darling!

Mabel said...

Lots of interesting points. As I bite my own nails in anticipation of Katie's wedding, I found this post a good thing to read. I guess love really is what's at the bottom of the whirwind of preparations and details, isn't it? As Fr. Heisler always says: "Love is in the details."

Any words of advice for the bridesmaids? I kind of think I'm not doing a good job of being self-sacrificing and loving in this endeavor. But that's another thought that probably deserves a post all its own.

healthily sanguine said...

My advice is just have fun with it. Weddings are supposed to be jolly good fun, and I'm sure Katie's will as much as anyone's. Don't try to do more than she asks you.

A new source of wedding stress I'd never considered: the wedding night! My friend told me about a wedding she went to where even after the couple got hitched, the bride was "freaking out" about the wedding night. Oh dear . . .

dark but fair said...

Haha! Well, there's not much you can do about THAT! I guess a bit more champagne might help, maybe...

j'aime o'gorman said...

a brief comment: one can "make" love happen, or not happen, in the sense that love is, fundamentally, a decision. the way that one decides that choice determines whether love will survive. i speak from both ends of that: having been on the receiving end of one who refused to love, having been in the position of not choosing to love a good man, and, finally, choosing to love an amazing man who was not at all what i "wanted."
and yes, champagne and strawberries DO help! ;)

j'aime o'gorman said...

i think we are emphasizing different sides of the same coin, as it were: that peculiar and paradoxical idea of free will. the God of the universe gives so completely, perfectly, wisely, and yet we still must choose to accept His good gifts.
and thanks for the congratulations! we are very excited.

lover of beauty said...

J'aime, you are absolutely right about this. In a certain sense we do nothing of our own, insofar as all comes from God, and all power we may have comes from God. But yes, free will is very much involved, as well, and ultimately, the decision to do or not to do, to love or not to love, to encourage love or not, rests with each of us individually. This is why so much unhappiness comes about. But God, in His infinite wisdom, allowed this nonetheless, for He knows that love is not true unless it is freely given, a conscious and considered act of the will toward another for mutual benefit and the glory of God.

As to the comments regarding the wedding night, while not having had one yet, my recommendation is to discuss your fears with your future husband. You may feel awkward about that, but I can guarantee it will help enormously to allay said fears! Obviously, J'aime dear, you are somewhat past this. :)

Have I ever mentioned how happy I am for you, and also how inspired I am by you? :)